the weather gets cooler, the leaves change color, and the world continues to move forward.
I often wonder about sadness. deep levels of it.
I have seen two former partners, both now good friends of mine, through times of depression when they were very sad. I’ve been dealing with it myself on and off for years, but for me, it seems to be set off by a particular event, like the loss of my job or the loss of a girlfriend. But because those are singular events, something else usually happens to snap me out of it before it gets too awful.
But it often takes months, and doing some of the simplest day-to-day tasks seem daunting and difficult.
It’s hard for me to fathom the depth people get to when they are truly, truly depressed, and decide they cannot continue living with such deep profound sadness, and instead of getting help, they end it all. i struggle to comprehend that depth.
I’m current watching another friend get sucked under, although I don’t think it’s anywhere near as bad as the above paragraph. The crushing weight of debt, of starting over again after a decade of marriage that ultimately did not work out, and just the simple challenges of everyday life have that person struggling to get out of bed every day.
I do think for many of us, sadness is something that is just beneath the surface.
Life can be so competitive, so challenging, so daunting, that I wonder if humanity isn’t quite wired for the levels we push ourselves to. In simpler times, we cooked, we cleaned, we explored. we worked together.
now, it seems just the opposite. Those tasks that were once the cornerstone of our lives, now are pushed to the wayside, and get done when they can be fit into the schedule. and we work against each other it seems. While ultimately looking out for number one is important, too many people have no problem kicking, clawing, and attacking others so longing as it gets themselves ahead of whatever warped goal they’re trying to attain.
I don’t know where I’m going with this. I guess it’s just random thoughts rattling around in my brain right now. Perhaps I’ll revisit this later, because I don’t know that I said much of anything worth a hoot here.